"worst Roommate Ever" Roommate Wanted: - Part 1(...

The ad was simple, tucked between a listing for a "vintage" beanbag and a used lawnmower:

Elias moved in that night. By midnight, the honeymoon phase ended. It started with a wet, dragging sound in the hallway— thump, slide, thump, slide. When Elias peered through the crack in his door, he saw Arthur dragging a heavy, plastic-wrapped bundle into the bathroom. "Worst Roommate Ever" Roommate Wanted - Part 1(...

"Just... refreshing the stuffing!" Arthur chirped, sensing the gaze. The ad was simple, tucked between a listing

Elias looked back at The Captain in the living room. He could have sworn the bear’s paw had moved six inches closer to his bedroom door. When Elias peered through the crack in his

Elias, drowning in debt and currently sleeping in his Honda Civic, didn't ask questions. He didn't even mind the taxidermy. He just wanted a door that locked.

Arthur pointed to the corner of the living room. A six-foot-tall grizzly bear stood on its hind legs, its glass eyes gleaming with an unnerving, lifelike malice. It was wearing a tiny sailor’s hat. "He’s sensitive," Arthur added.

"The room is upstairs," Arthur whispered, his eyes never quite meeting Elias’s. "Rules are simple: No guests. No loud music. And never, under any circumstances, touch 'The Captain.'" "The Captain?" Elias asked.